the friend who can be silent with us
in a moment of despair or confusion,
who can stay with us
in an hour of grief or bereavement,
who can tolerate
not knowing...not healing...not curing
that is a friend who cares.
Henri Nouwen
to each who has silently come by for a visit
or dropped and email to say hello
THANK YOU SO
or dropped and email to say hello
THANK YOU SO
april showers came hard
leaving puddles
water filled deep
so deep
that i felt
as if i couldn't wade one more step
as if i couldn't wade one more step
without sinking
drowning
i needed some time to grasp life
it.changes.all.in.a.blink.of.an.eye
and this time
i was struggling to deal with the pain, saddness, anger, frustrations
i was struggling to deal with the happiness of my day to day
i was trying to
grieve
grieve
understand
process
accept
accept
and just get through the days
more overwhelmed
than anything
the flu passed and brought in a round of colds
we suffered loss and celebrated the lives
of
four loved one
of
four loved one
one wee little had started all over
{after 1 year and 7 months
his seizures have come back}
his seizures have come back}
canceled fathers BIG surprise birthday
then
may flowers came in full bloom
and our hearts began healing
our minds quietly sitting with ease
one fathers smaller...no longer surprise birthday party soon to be
family would be arriving in a matter of days
{8-30+ years have passed since we have seen some}
and then
june arrived
a simple smaller birthday party was given
to honor and celebrate my father turning 70
take.a.deep.breath
SKY DIVING
this was per my fathers request
six of us including my father
fell from 13,ooo feet
on a gorgeous gloomy june day
one littles seizures
are being controlled by an increase in meds
my love and i's anniversary celebrated
one wee little celebrated
7
one wee older celebrated
13
and as if that wasn't enough excitement to be had
I have been chosen
to Officiate a wedding in August
and so alas
as july makes way
the skies are becoming ever so clear
warmth is rising
the gray is dissipating
with a welcoming nice big deep breath
i can
... sigh ...
relishing in the nothing
the calmness of what shall come
there are no plans set in stone
no busyness
no...nothing
just to simply be
17 comments:
my thoughts have been with you but I knew that when like my beloved turtles, you pull your self back into your shell that you are taking care of you. And so I waited, but I am glad to hear of you. Be well my friend, Oma Linda
I have been thinking of you and feel like I need to take a breath after reading this. Be well my friend, and well wishes to your babies and eye candy as well ; )
So nice to read a new post from you, Brandi! I knew something must be going on -- I'm glad increased meds will keep your little one in good health again. I guess as kids grow, gain weight and get bigger, medication levels need to be adjusted too. Family reunion! Skydiving! Birthdays! Officiating at an upcoming wedding! Yowza!
oh my goodness~
you have indeed been through so very much
a mix of challenge and beautiful life too
i send you light, may grace fill your days and nights.
Sending big hugs xxx
B- our thoughts have been with you in this period of post absence. So much in your life - the joys and the struggles. And as TL says a mix of challenges and beauty also. We will just continue to send love and vibes your way; and enjoy seeing you pop up on the sidebar when time, energy and life permits. Go well. B
How wonderful it is to hear from you again! So much has been happening, but still you find light and beauty and strength. Wishing you a beautiful July with much love and happiness!
Pleased to hear that littles things are happening in the right directions, and that good little things are happening after such a difficult and wearing time. Go well, stay strong and look after yourself. F
So glad that you are here, catching us up on your journey. A very good friend of mine has a daughter that suffers grand mals. Theirs is a delicate dance with limiting triggers & adjusting meds, yet they live a very happy life. Love & blessings to you & the family during these adjustment periods. Skydiving is a nice way to release, isnt it?
ahhhh.... I felt a nudge to come by and visit ur blog and here you are and I'm so glad to hear from you.
love to you all <3
Brandi,
I've missed you so and thought of you often during your absence here. But I totally understand. There are times when we need to step back and retreat for a little while. I hope all is well at your end. Love and light to you and your family.
xoxo
Jane
Hello, Dear Brandi!
I have been away on vacation and am finally home...I knew I needed to check in on you...to make sure you were still hanging in there...
...I never expecting skydiving! Wow!
HUgs to you and your beautiful family,
Cameron
What can I say? Do not lose faith, be strong? Nothing that you already have tried and done. Still you are here and alive. Living. Yes, living. Who said life is perfect? Who said our loved ones will live forever? No one, yet I always thought it so. I was a fool. Be good. Tsup!
just passing by *wave* & sending love xo
sometimes life it too "real" and we don't understand. we must keep at life, all of us. i think of you often and send out prayers for the good things of life to come to you and yours.
((hugs))
I've not been by in far too long...and it seems you have your hands quite full and heart as well. Sending love from across the sea...if you have the energy and feel drawn to do so... please send me an email with what you are grateful for in THIS moment for the gratitude quilt... it will be unfurled in all its glory on Nov 22nd.
gentle steps my friend
thinking of you this evening...you have not been forgotten in my heart.
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~your thoughts i do adore...thank you so for taking time to leave your words of wisdom~